ALIVE – 2010
1. PERPETUAL BLACK SECOND
Trapped in a ceaseless fever of spite
An unending fit of resentment and anger
Caught in a moment of unforgiveness
In the snapshot of a hatefilled second
The speedless flickering of uncomprehending eyes
Dialated in disbelief
Your vacant gaze distorted
Twisted in its accusing glare
Teeth glimmering in emotional rage
Spit of hate suspended mid-air
Bodies strained in fury
Devoured by jaws of despair
One single image frame I wish to forget
Now replayed in succession of millions
The one second I will always regret
My hell found in its reiteration
Held within the visualization,
The continuous rerun of my own violence
A fraction of time perpetuated
By my regretful soul animated
Please forgive the evil in me
The darkness within
Ferocious, inherent demon
Adrenaline gland resident
Threatened subconscious snake
Repressed into striking coil
Surfacing that black second
Ascending with the boil
2. ELECTRIC RED
Humanity peeled from our bones
Deprived of integuments that make us real
Shadows of flesh to maintain the system
Our own blood splashes as we kneel
So meticulously machined
Into these obedient devices
Puppets, finetuned submissive drones
Replicas of each other, clones
We’re dormant accumulations of flesh
In a crimson filtered twilight
Mute witnesses to the game
Wrenches to keep the bolts of lies tight
We’re the fabric concealing the stains
The red tainted existence
The gullibles to bless your sins away
Rags to wipe your blooded trails
Our minds give in to the atrophy,
To the twining of self-thought knowledge
The purpose of the human mind reviled
Everlasting ignorance realized
The scarlet flood inundates our powerless thoughts
Defenseless minds with lies overfed
Every thought stained, defiled
Painted the color, the shade of electric red
3. RATIONAL GAZE
Squint your eyes to see clearly. Blur reality to make it real
Let focus go from your deceiving eyes
To know what’s been concealed
We’ve all been blinded – Subjects to visual misinformation
A systematic denial of the crystalline
Our light-induced image of truth
Filtered blank of its substance
As our eyes won’t adhere to intuitive lines
Everything examined. Separated, one thing at a time
The harder we stare the more complete the disintegration
To see the fine grain, to read the hidden words
The context of parallel truth – Devoid of fragmentation
Eyes re-opened, susceptible
Reasoning focalized. Receptors activated
Perspectives distorted
The ladder beyond our grasp
The twin-headed serpent forever hidden
Where’s the true knowledge
Where engines of the sane and insanity merge
The clarity, the unity
Reality untouchable, transparent, invisible
To our fixed, restricted fields of vision
Existence taken for granted, absolute
Uncomprehended by our content minds
Possessed, owned, run, controlled
By the common sense-infected rational gaze
Onward forever we walk among the ignorant
Never stray from the common lines
4. PRAVUS
Drooling floods of led
Armed with distorded belief
Sharp munition spat from our minds
Malignancy-rounds, automatic fire
Black, acidic bile
Seeping wounds of shattered souls
Still not pissing out fast enough
To quench our thirst for it to bleed us dry
Vile, ever-menacing intent
Repulsive belligerance shot from toxic minds
Blatant disregard for all but self
Proudly flaunting the depravity of a race condemned, malign
Iterate. Repeat these my words
Recite the mantra of late
I will corrupt and impair
Vitiate, dispirit, debase, violate
Soul born with hateful intent
The deceitful spawn, descendants of lies
By the poisoned nails of history stung
If granted the will to injure
If granted the will to harm
The blades of hurt inexhaustibly swung
5. LETHARGICA
The void clenches its determined jaws
A lethargic, careless motion to kill
Monstrous, prodigous, indifferent
Slow and deliberate its torturous skills
Its molars grind and shatter
Onerous, leaden bringers of hurt
Unhurried in its deadly intent
The undoer of all – Dense and inert
Its design perfected through aeons
Pure, immaculate, clean. Omnicidal God/Machine
Calm, precise ambition
Untroubled by the roar of unending screams,
The droning blare of absolute doom
The downpitched moan of collapsing dreams
Composed, cold, unconditional
Uncompromising til all is death
Extinction, ruin – Its malicious cause
Til the last exhalation of human breath
6. COMBUSTION
No more ifs, no bias, no ambiguity
No wondering wether this is it
Clarity so brightly shining
The image so painfully absolute
No edges blurred on this awareness
No unknown weight to tip the knowledge scales
Eyes dilated to grasp it all
As every illusion of what we are fails
An unquestionable picture – determined, complete
It’s chrystalline lines untouched by doubt
So vivid, so deprived of hesitation
Shining in its evil splendor
The burning hatred of man
A million degrees on display
Human voracity delineated
The demons in us all by fumes portrayed
Stare, see, take in, grasp
Comprehend, assimilate, behold your reflection
It’s framing – Gold plated lies
The canvas – Hurting souls caught and weaved
The artist – The human dream
Incinerated, devoured, deceived
7. STRAWS PULLED AT RANDOM
What solace lies in the arms of fate
The ill embrace of uncertainty
When did I leave this in other hands
To be pulled down at chance
Ripped away by destiny-claws
Am I another of fate’s possessions
Dwelling the lie of freedom
Just another straw pulled at random
Reclaimed by deceiving time
A silent judgement I can not overrule
Drawn back into the origin-vortex
Uprooted and ground to dust
Retracted into anti-existence
A magnet repelled by life’s polarity
Denied the self control of fate
We flow suspended in semi-life
Until the ever imminent day
When oblivion claims our breath
Nowhere indefinitely
Not dead, not alive
Existence-patterns ripped of symmetry
As will and fate divide
Have I appeased the gods of fate
Am I allowed another day
Must I die to escape
The scanning eyes of death
8. NEW MILLENNIUM CYANIDE CHRIST
I’m a carnal, organic anagram
Human flesh instead of written letters
I rearrange my pathetic tissue. I incise
I replace. I’m reformed
I eradicate the fake pre-present me
Elevate me to a higher human form
The characters I am, made into a word complete
Then I’ll be the new norm
Self inflicted fractures. I replace my bones with bars
Aluminum bleeding oxide
The drug of gods into my pounding veins
My receiving eyes exchanged with fuses
Blindness induced to prevent destruction
Ceramic blades implanted past my ribs
To save me from the dues of inhalation
I tear my worldly useless skin
Staples to pin it over my ears
Non-receptive of ungodly sounds
I disable the audio-generators of fear
Hexagonol bolts to fill my mouth
Sharpened to deplete the creator of all violence
Without speech their will be no deceit
Baptized in vitriolic acid. A final touch
A smoothing of features
Completion of the greatest art
To cast the godly creatures
Humans, once astray. Made divine
Stripped of congenital flaws
We’re incandescent revelations in a world of darkened forms
Disciples, come join with me to save a failed humanity
Follow the god of cyanide into the new eternity
Behold; A sacrificial rase a cleansing worshipping of pain
The new millennium christ here to redeem all from lies
9. STENGAH
Lacerating pains of degeneration speed
Through your trembling mind
Still, in machine-like strife you gain another mile
The temporary elusive goal
To reach the solace, to feed once more
Upon the synthetic reaper of loss
No matter the outcome. No matter the cost
Cold and stinging needs tearing through the halls
Of your defiled, fleshmade temple with its closing walls
Still you claim the worshipper’s pose and you bow. You kneel
Control. Once superior, now a docile pet at chaos’ feet
Pulling the leash as it trails
The scent to where all hurt recedes
Your past a blurry patch in mind
Your future once, now thin dreams filed
Toward the lights of need you strive
To drink into your vein the shine
Beaten to the unforgiving ground. Lashed into submission
By the inner starving demon. By its unrelenting hand
Still you claim the worshipper’s pose and you bow
You kneel to the syringe
Answering only to authorities of sedation
Their calls the only ones heeded
A worn out soldier touched by their contagion
A battered drone at their feet
You’re the one betrayed
An outcast set afire by your inner war
Your burning self so far astray
A combustion fanned from within your core
10. THE MOUTH LICKING WHAT YOU’VE BLED
I’m the shallow, the superficial. I’m the common man
Faithless, narrow minded, indifferent, impassive
A sycophantic leech. Tantamount to disintegrity
I’m the vulture feeding on malignancy
I’m the sin, the lecherous sneering at prostration
I wallow in disease. I rejoice at degradation
I yawn at misery. Spit at others happiness
An advocate of maipulation. I embrace the sickening
I’m the lost. I’m average. I’m common
I’m infection. I’m human. I’m common
A worm thriving in seas of disgust. I’m common
The mouth licking what you’ve bled. I’m common
I’m the pampered degenerate. I indulge my inclinations
The only words to my attention are those that I myself creat
Disorder. Chaos
I debar all order, repudiate all purity
Infatuated by contentment
I laugh at lies
Come behold the sickness in my common human eyes
I’m the greed, the cynic. I’m the indifferent gaze
Mendacity, betrayal. This is not a phase
Ebullient with human filth. Here I am. Here I stay
Flourishing in our disgrace. Blessed be the human way
11. HUMILIATIVE
I’m the concrete leper, sickness repulsion embodied
But hear the sermon escaping my vermin mouth
You might even stay with me in the dirt
I’m soaked in putrid sewage risen from empty words
To you a legion of nausea
I’m your sins i’m your crown of thorns
I’ve seen the blood of generations
The ravenous mouth called system
We’re all shaped by vulgar hands
The grip of hate and lies
The sustenance to our bellicose ways
An ignorance almost justified
As the gap of humanity friction grows
The skull of life – lobotomized
Hear me, i’m ignominy
There’s no renaissance in bleeding – no
I’ve flown a million minds, black in despair
The liquids of uncertainty spit into their eyes
Our flesh embedded in counters of iniquity
It seems like we are all just merchandise not civilized
No words we adapt in our silence paralyzed
To changes erasing our last denial lines
Attitudes crucified, still we’re going on
Crawling toward submissive suicide
12. BLEED
Beams of fire sweep through my head
Thrusts of pain increasingly engaged
Sensory receptors succumb
I am no one now – Only agony
My crimson liquid so frantically spilled
The ruby fluid of life unleashed
Ripples ascend to the surface of my eyes
Their red pens drawing at random, at will
A myriad pains begotten in their wake
The bastard spawn of a mutinous self
The regurgitation of my micro nemesis
Salivating red at the prospect of my ruin, my doom
Malfunction the means for its ascent
Bloodletting the stringent voice to beckon my soul
So futile any resisting tension
As death-induced mechanics propel its growth
The implement, the device of my extinction
The terminating clockwork of my gleeful bane
The definitive scourge of its mockery
The end-art instruments lethality attained
Heed – it commands. Heed my will
Bleed – it says. Bleed you will
Falling into the clarity of undoing
Scornful gods haggle for my soul
Minds eye flickers and vellicates as I let go
Taunting whispers accompany my deletion
A sneering grin, the voice of my reaper
Chanting softly the song of depletion



